The exciting Tory leadership contest has begun?

Former Tory party chairman Grant Shapps has crawled out from under his grime-covered rock to try to activate a leadership challenge to Theresa May.  For anyone who is not a Tory supporter, any such challenge (and its outcome if successful) is only a source of amusement.  A Tory is a Tory.  However, the dearth of capable candidates is worth noting.

So far – (by October 6th) – just two people have publicly backed Shapps’ desire for a change of leadership, namely Sebastian Fox and Michael Green.  The intrinsic cowardice of the Tory psyche deters others from immediately supporting his aim.

GrantShappses
Grant Shapps, Michael Green and Sebastian Fox

Possible candidates

Imagine opening a fridge to find only one floppy carrot, a dribble of post sell by date milk and a large jar of unopened rancid pickled eggs.  Disappointment would ensue, but, if very hungry, one would probably make some effort with the carrot.  Analogously, which Tory is the floppy carrot?

Current cabinet members

Michael Gove?

  • (When education minister) a key protagonist in the destruction of state education
  • Obsequious interview with Donald Trump
  • Opposed to the NHS

Stephen Hammond?

  • Very, very close to the Saudi royal family – That’s a nice watch Mr. Hammond!
  • (As chancellor of the exchequer) a strong advocate of vicious cuts to welfare provision that mainly target people with disabilities

Amber Rudd?

  • (As home secretary) a persistent perpetrator of contempt of court with respect to illegal deportations
  • Indulged in voluminous corporate tax avoidance prior to being an MP

Priti Patel

  • Corporate plant in politics 
  • Support for vicious cuts to welfare provision

Boris Johnson?

  • Persistent racism, bigotry and xenophobia
  • Financially disastrous tenure as mayor of London, including millions wasted on the absurd “garden bridge”
  • (When mayor of London ) reckless cuts to fire service in London – (to please his property developer friends) – that were factors in the severity of the Grenfell Tower fire
  • Professional liar and confidence trickster
  • Very lazy
  • A moron

Liam Fox?

  • (As defence minster) allowed a non-governmental business associate to attend international meetings
  • Stated that Britain has “shared values” with mass murderer Philippines president Rodrigo Duterte

Other

Jacob Rees-Mogg?

Ruth Davidson?

  • Scottish Tory Party, led by Davidson, is pock-marked with MSPs, councillors and activists who have been unsuspended after having been suspended (briefly) for a variety of racist or bigoted comments and acts.
  • Vacuous, hollow soundbiter

Do the Tories have anyone in reserve as thrilling as a man called Owen Smith?  Could Johnny Mercer, James Cleverly or Nadine Dorries be the sacrificial stalking donkey?  Will Ken Clarke try one last hurrah?  A nation awaits.

The exciting Tory leadership contest has begun?

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